Category: Politics

Letter to White Women

TO MY FELLOW WHITE WOMEN:

I see parallels between 4B (the movement in which women are swearing off dating, sex, and marriage with men, as well as childbearing) and Black women walking away from us. Just as all women reserve the right to not trust men because of their history of harm toward us, so do Black women reserve the right to not trust us. Just as you want men to stop the “not all of us” nonsense, don’t do it to Black women.

You may have voted for Harris. You may be a fierce advocate. You may have written letters and made phone calls and canvassed. You may check your internalized bias and do perspective-taking every day. You may have acknowledged your privilege and strive to use it to tear down what’s wrong and replace it with what’s right.

But no one knows that by looking at you, and part of the work is understanding this. Empathy demands that if we feel compelled to respond to Black women’s social media and other discussion about how they are withdrawing from White women, our response would be “I can’t blame you.”

P.S. Blue bracelets aren’t going to cut it. It’s like when a man says “I’m a nice guy.” I don’t know about you, but my response to that is “Talk is cheap.” Another part of the work is not wanting or expecting recognition for doing it. The work is doing what’s right ONLY because it’s right.

It Begins

In case anyone was wondering about the social fallout of Donald Trump winning Tuesday’s election, it’s already starting.

Men are commenting on women’s social media saying “your bodies, our choice.” I’ve read several accounts by parents whose daughters came home from school in tears after boys said that to them.

There are accounts of children of immigrants coming home afraid because their classmates are telling them they’re going to be deported.

There are posts advising gay couples to get their affairs set up as though they were single so they can be prepared for when their marriages are annulled.

There are posts telling people with chronic illnesses how to get their medications on the dark web when they lose their insurance, and posts hinting at where to get drugs to die by suicide when people can no longer afford their treatments.

Women who can afford to buy Plan B are being advised to stock up so they have some to take or to give their friends and daughters in the event of sexual assault.

People are posting Google docs listing the names of physicians who will perform tubal ligations, no questions asked.

People in marriages that might otherwise survive rough patches are throwing in the towel and deciding to divorce, in preparation for the abolishment of no-fault divorce.

This is the country the Trump-humpers are creating. They sold out their own wives and daughters, sisters and mothers, aunts and grandmothers. They sold out their friends and neighbors. They sold out the people who built their homes, gather and transport their food, teach their children, defend this country, and save their lives.

There will be no joy in saying “I told you so.”

Birds flying through a storm, with a haiku that says "beating wings, tempest of acid, blown off course."
Image: Artin Bakhan Words: Me

Venom

Image: Charles Deluvio Words: Me

Today’s word is “venom.” You know that regardless of the election’s outcome, we’re going to have to hear that loudmouth for some time to come. If he wins, the reason is obvious. If he loses, as long as media and the gullible and the bigoted are willing to encourage him in spewing forth his vulgar word salad, we’ll all be subjected to it.

I skipped yesterday’s word, which was “cornucopia.” The meaning is fine. It’s just an ugly-sounding word to me and I don’t want to use it creatively.